Thursday, May 31, 2012

way too much fun

i am just having way too much fun dressing this girl up, playing with her hair, putting new bows or headbands in her hair, taking pictures of her, lovin on her.. shes a beauty! 

Tuesday, May 29, 2012

things you can do to help new moms

i saw someone pin this article on pintrest about how to help a new mom. it got me thinking about what really helped me when i was a new mom- what did i like the most? so, incase you are wondering, here was what i liked the most when i was a brand new mommy the first month or son. 

1- the biggest and best surprise i got as a new mommy was to come home to a spotless house. i went into labor 2 weeks early, and had not done laundry, dishes, made my bed, picked up my clothes, cleaned the bathroom, taken out the trash- nothing. my house was a disaster the day i left to go to the hospital. i cannot tell you how many hours i spent worrying about how i was going to come home with a new baby, and come home to a dirty house. how was i going to ever get it clean with a new baby to take care of, and my body aching and trying to heal? well, my husband and best friend schemed. he gave my best friend, Ally, the keys to our apartment. she offered to clean it all while we were in the hospital. neither of them told me, or even hinted to me that this would be happening. kevin was with me at the hospital the whole time so i just knew i would have to come home to clean. 

well, the minute we walked into our house, i wouldn't believe my eyes. i had tears rolling down my face, as i walked through every room. it smelled soo good (she had plugged in my scentsy) and was spotless. you could even see lines on the carpet from where she vacuumed. that was the best gift i received, by far. i was embarrassed that my best friend cleaned all my crap up- and that i couldn't have kept it clean in the first place, but i was sooo grateful that she could look beyond my flaws and help me out in the area that was most needed. thank you ally, i will never EVER forget that. 

2- meals. no matter what the mom says- 'oh my husband likes to cook' 'my mom will be in town' 'oh we will be just fine'... TAKE THEM MEALS! even if your husband likes to cook, he will be too tired to cook. even if your mom is in town, she wont be wanting to cook, she will be helping you and the baby. and you really won't want to cook the first little while. you will want to sleep, spend time with your baby, and relax. i had meals lined up for 4 days. i am so grateful for those 4 days of meals, although it would have been nice to have a whole week! haha. 

my visiting teachers brought me a meal, as well as my friends kilee and eliza who brought me something i could freeze incase i had enough meals that week brought to me but didn't want to cook next week when the meals stopped. that was a blessing! another girl in my ward brought me some homemade soup in a big mason jar. my friend jena ordered pizza to our house. and boy oh boy, it was goooood! really, the meals were a blessing and I am so grateful for those. my visiting teacher also brought paper plates and cups because she knew we wouldn't want to be doing dishes. SCORE! that was awesome. 

3- my mom and sister came over one night to play with mia while i took a shower. i could have put mia in her bouncer by the shower (which is usually what I do) and taken a quick one, but it was soo nice to have them there to play with her so i could take my time showering and relaxing. if you can, go hang out with the new moms kids so she can do whatever it is she wants to do/get done at home, and doesn't have to worry about being quick about it to get back to the kids/baby. 

4- random visits. my best friend ally always randomly would text me and say she missed me and the baby. she would come over and just snuggle mia, and give me a little break. sometimes new moms only talk to their baby all day, and could use a little adult time. so although i wasn't always feeling up to getting out, it was nice when people came for a visit and i could have a conversation with them. 

those are a few things that I loved the most. what help did you love as a new mom?

alot of tears, but alot of blessings

there has been lots of this in our house the last couple of weeks. 


mia has had a bad couple of weeks, and has not felt well at all. she went from a cold, to a slight ear ache, to not eating at all, to a tummy ache, to a red throat, to loosing weight, to no naps, to wanting to be held all the time. she has been through alot these last few weeks, poor thing! 

these last few weeks have been trying for me- because I will say that so far until she has been sick, being a mom has been a piece of cake. mia is normally a really easy baby. she sleeps through the night, she ate really well, she took naps, she hardly ever cried.. so it was really easy. infact, when she was two months old, i would tell people, heck ya, I could easily do this again in less than a year. i would love to have more babies quick, because this has been so fun and easy! 

i still think it's fun. its kinda like playing house when you are a little kid. haha. 
and it for the most part has still been easy. 

but there have been a few days... a few days where i just don't know what to do. people have told me they would come watch mia to give me a break. but I don't need a break. it's not the crying that bothers me. it's the fact that she wont eat. the fact that i know she is STARVING from the sound of her cry, the cues she gives me, and the chomping on her binky- but no matter how hard i try to breastfeed or bottle feed, she does not want to eat. she eventually eats, and some eatings are OK for the most part. I would say 40% of her eatings are ok. but the other 60%... oh boy. it's a trying time for us both. 

I have tried so many different things. making sure the milk is warm, going on a lactose diet, giving her different formulas, only feeding her in dark quiet places so she can be calm, giving her gas drops, and taken her to the doctor three times now. 

in the course of 4 days, she lost 4 ounces. 

that's when they decided she probably was getting an ear infection, so they gave her some amoxacillen. 

over the course of that medicine so far, she has finally gained her weight back. She is now 10 pounds 8 ounces. 

we finally gave her a blessing the other night, after she had a crying fit for hours and wouldn't eat. 

now i am not too naive. i know babies just cry sometimes. i know babies can have colic. 

but, that's just not how mia has been so far. this fussiness has only just started the last two or three weeks, and its accompanied by not eating, and arching her back. 

i know it's all about trial and error. i feel like a million people have been wanting to help me by giving me their input on what they did or how their baby was, or to tell me how to stop worrying, but she is my baby, and i know what is best for her in the end. all i can do is hope that she will either get better, or that i will feel peace knowing that she isn't sick, she is just being a fussy baby. 

either way, it's been a trying time for me in the last 3 weeks. i guess you can call this time when i really got poured into motherhood, as everyone keeps telling me, haha. i would have to say the hardest part of being a mom is not knowing exactly what your child needs at all times. all i want to do is make sure she is healthy and happy. 

sometimes, i think, am i the only one who takes their baby to the doctor? who has problems with their baby not eating? who feels lost at times? not many others share the reality of life, but i do, because when i get to thinking, life is not perfect, nor is it a walk in the park 24-7. and if you pretend like it is, reality is gonna hit you like a ton of bricks one of these days. 

although it's been a little hard the last 3 weeks, i still have to say that i am still enjoying my time as a mom. in my opinion, there is no greater joy than being able to snuggle your baby when she is sad and making it all better- ending with a smile. she is my pride and joy, and my best friend. 

i can do this, because heavenly father blessed me with all this love for this baby girl. he blessed me with all the care in the world. he blessed me with patience with her. he blessed me with a mothers intuition. he blessed me with a supportive husband and family. and he blessed me with the most amazing gift of all, mia. 

i am blessed my friends, very blessed. 

Saturday, May 26, 2012

lil Lucy

My brother Dave and his wife Tana just welcomed their 2nd baby girl into this world on the 24th! Her name is Lucy, and she is so beautiful!! I just had to share pictures, hopefully they won't be upset I am sharing them before they posted on their blog. :)

Of course Tana looks amazing, like always. And cute baby A loving on Lucy! 

Just look at that beauty with all that dark hair. I love it! 

Lucy was 8 pounds 2 ounces. They live in Virginia so I probably won't get to meet Lucy for a really long time... :( But I can love on her through pictures and skype. Congrats Dave and Tana! You guys make cute kids!! 

Thursday, May 24, 2012


i made a signature for my blog, lets see if it will post. 

3 months

if I wouldn't get turned into child protective services, I would put Mia in the freezer to stop time. HAHA, totally kidding. But really, what the heck, how is my baby 3 months old!? She is growing up so fast. I love how smiley she is and how much she talks and coos. I love the stage she is in right now, and I am getting more excited for her to giggle... which I think will happen really soon! 

Here is little Mia tonight after her bath. 

Here are some things about my lil miss mia at 3 months old: 

Her hair is outta control. It is growing like a weed. She has major bed head every time she wakes up. This is how she woke up the other day. I call this her Donald picture. She has Donald Trump hair! Just look at that combover... 

Another thing is that she is starting to grab toys! See those toys in the picture below? She will grab on to the rattle (most of the time by accident) and stick it right in her mouth. 

She smiles ALL the time. If you are making faces at her, or smiling at her, she will smile right back! 

She is just starting to grow out of her newborn clothes. She now wears some 0-3 although she can still fit in all of her newborn.. they are just getting too short on her legs. 

Mornings are her happiest time of the day. She loves when I un-swaddle her and change her diaper, and open the blinds so the sun comes through. You will see her smile the most at this time of day. 

She will be going swimming for her first time ever next month. I know shes little, but don't worry, we will keep lots and LOTS of sunscreen on her, a hat on her, and not let her head get wet. Just incase you were judging. haha. We are taking a vacation to St. George with Ally and Kelvin and there is a pool so we will be taking advantage of that! My sister gave us a swimsuit thats freaking adorable, but then I saw this one at target and it was 7.99 but I had a two dollar off coupon, and couldnt resist... So she has two swimsuits now. 

We can put clips in her hair. I think they make her look much older, but they do stay in! 

She will not sleep if I dont give her a bath at night time. She loves her routine. Bath time, swaddle, feed her, sing to her, and put her in bed. And she sleeps through the night, from 9pm to 8am usually. 

She weighed 10 pounds 4 ounces at her doctor on Tuesday. We had to take her in because she wasn't eating, and she acted like she had an ear infection. Alas, she does have one, but the medacine is helping her and she is feeling better now. She is starting to get some meat on her bones, as pictured below, but she is still a tiny little thing. I think she is in like the 5th percentile for weight, and 15th for height. But I am not sure, that could have changed since last time. I just put it all in online on and thats what it said she was. 

She loves help in sitting up. She likes to sit up on my lap, and will also stand if I hold on to her! She seems very advanced for her age but hey, im just a proud mamma! (This was tonight, when Katy and Grandma Clark came to watch So you think you can dance with me and eat dinner. Fun girls night!)

She makes this face all the time. She still doesnt like her carseat that much. Always cries when you first put her in. 

She loves her bouncer. Kevins mom bought us this one the other day. We have been borrowing my sister in laws, thanks Amy! Now Mia has her very own. :) 

She may be lactose intolerant, as the doctor said at her appointment the other day. So, I am on a dairy free diet. I also have some formula that is for lactose intolerant babies that they gave me to try, since I need to supplement one ounce per feeding if she still acts hungry. 

We love our sweet baby, and can't believe how fast time is flying by. She is the light of our lives, and makes us laugh all the time! Happy 3 months old Mia! 

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

knee surgery

well, I had my visit with the orthopedic surgeon today.

Looks like I am due for surgery.

He said he thinks I have a meniscus tear again, as well as Patellar Tendinitis . I also possibly have some messed up cartilage underneath my knee cap that needs to be cleaned up. He wants to do a scope, but I am not sure when I will get it done because of the baby. I told him I only had a 3 month old and didn't want to stop breastfeeding yet and didn't know how I would work it all out. He said that I could get an MRI, see how extensive the injury is, and that way we will be able to figure out how long the recovery will be. That way, I can decide if I want to do it now, or wait till Mia gets a few months older or I have enough milk supply to feed her that while I am out of commission.

I am not sure I can wait much longer, so for now, I am just having faith that it will not hurt in the meantime and that the MRI doesn't show the injury to be as bad as it seems. I am almost positive I will still have to get surgery no matter what, (thats what the doc said) I just don't know when yet.

I am super bummed out about it, but I know everything will work out. I have lots of friends and family who are around and I know they would all be more than willing to help. I also think it helps that I have had knee surgery before to fix a torn meniscus so I know a little of what the recovery will be like at least. That makes me feel more prepared- although maybe scared too since it wasn't that fun of a recovery...

Curse my bad knees.. at least I have legs that let me walk though. That is something to be grateful for.

For now, I am wearing a leg sleeve thing to hold it together and hopefully help with the pain. My MRI is next Thursday. Wish me luck! Update to come soon...

Tuesday, May 22, 2012

a look back

I just got some more pictures from the day Mia was born from my mom. These pictures were the ones she took before I had my epidural... haha. Lots of pain! I was looking at these tonight and remembering how much pain I was in. I have almost totally forgotten about that pain I went through because it just all have been so worth it. 

My mom had to take a picture of my contractions on the screen. 

The view outside my room, so pretty. 

Large and in charge. With no makeup, and hair crazzzzzy. 

More contractions... Gosh. They hurt. So. Bad. I couldn't talk to anyone in the room or move! 

Trying to sit up to relieve some of the pain. 

I was so glad Kevin was there... He helped me so much! I would grab his hand or my moms hand when I had a contraction and would have to just BREATHE and TRY To relax. (yeah right, try relaxing with a contraction. Its way too hard) 

This was when they were trying to give me the IV. I got poked 7 times by 4 different nurses because they couldn't get a vein! I was too dehydrated. 

My dad came to bring my mom her nice camera, and I had just thrown up. He came in all chipper and wanting to talk but I just could not talk. All I wanted was the throw up bag by me, quiet, and a wet rag on my head!

Anyway, my point in even posting this was that I honestly had to look at these pictures to even remember how hard it was. It's amazing how quickly all the pain and hard things you go through over the 9 months kind of diminish from your mind once the baby comes. Every day I look at Mia and just think, WOW! That was totally worth it! I would do it a million times over just to have her forever! 

Although it's been a couple of rough days with her and she has been sick, I am so grateful that I have her. Through all the tears, she is still my favorite little girl and I am glad to have her in my life.  

I love you miss mia! you were worth the contractions, throwing up, constipation (haha), back pains, weight gain, stretch marks, healing after the fact, and tiredness. You were worth it a million times over. I hope you stay my best friend forever. 

love, mommy

Monday, May 21, 2012

on my mind

there are a few things on my mind tonight.

1-my knee. it hurts like a mother. with every day, it's getting worse. here is a little background on it: I grew up dancing. In 2005 my knees got really bad. I spent the year doing physical therapy to try to strengthen my muscles around the knee to hold off surgery, but after an MRI and more pain, the doc decided I needed to get surgery. I had a torn meniscus on both knees, as well as me needing a bi-lateral release.   I got the surgery done on both knees at the same time. It was a scope. I was supposed to be able to walk right after, although it would be very painful. It was the worst surgery I have ever had. (and I have had 4). Here is what my knees looked like a week or two after surgery:

I couldn't kneel for over a year after and I had to quit dance. My knees would get really swollen and I have had problems with them every since. I think there were more problems with it than we anticipated... and it really is getting worse with every day now.

To be honest, it hurts more now than it ever has before. Both knees hurt, but my right one is definitly worse. It has popped out of place, it has gotten stuck so that I can't straighten it, it has given out on me.. bad stuff. As I am typing right now, it's throbbing. I have been trying to be tough about it, and continue with my walks with Mia and trying to work out and do my every day things, but I am quickly realizing that something very wrong is going on with my knee. I can't even kneel down at the tub to give Mia a bath anymore. It hurts to wear heels. It hurts to bend my knees. It hurts to stand up from sitting. It is swollen.

I honestly am TERRIFIED To go to the doctor because I know something is wrong, and I am scared to get the verdict. What if I have to get surgery again? Who will take care of Mia? How will I kneel down to play with her? What if I have to be on pain meds (I know I would have to be because I am a baby) and can't breast feed? Who will cook and clean (since Kevin works and goes to school so much)? Who will help me out when I need to get up to go potty or eat for those first few days when I can't walk? Who will carry the carseat to and from the car when I am on crutches? Oh my, so much stress going on in my mind right now. I can't help but have the tears just roll down my face right now.... I am just STUCK in a rut. I need to get this knee figured out because it hurts so bad, but I just don't want to with Mia being so little... but i'm afraid if I wait too long it will get worse, and then the surgery would be more intense. (That is if surgery is the verdict.) what to do what to do...

2-Mia is not eating well. She used to be such a good eater and breastfeeding really wasn't hard for me. For some reason, this last week she will just cry and cry when she first latches on and won't eat. I have to stick the binky in her mouth to calm her down and then I can remove the binky and help her latch on. Even then though, she will only stay latched on for a few minutes, then pull off and cry, almost as if she is in pain. She will take the bottle, but won't eat for very long with it either. I let her eat whenever she acts hungry- it's not like I am holding her off for hours to try to get her on a schedule because I try to follow her feeding ques instead. Because she isn't eating a ton like she was before, I feel like my milk supply is going down.

I took her to the doctor to talk to the doctor about it and she said if Mia still acts hungry and I feel empty, I can supplement her with formula. She weighed her and she had only gained half of what she needed to gain from her last appointment. I just hate that I have the ability to breastfeed her and for some reason all the sudden she doesn't want to. She doesn't even really want to eat with the bottle either. She will, but I think its just because it's easier to suck out of because I am not making enough milk. I feel so sad about it. I know that some people can't breast feed and some people don't like it and some people just don't make enough milk, but I was doing so good until just this week! I have no idea what happened. I drink tons of water and have pumped but for some reason my milk supply isn't as much as it used to be. Maybe Mia just doesn't want to work as hard to get the milk now that it isn't coming out as easy. Ugh. I just want to cry.. I have enjoyed breastfeeding and want to keep doing so. I will keep trying and trying until I just can't anymore, because I just enjoy that bonding time with her and I know it's better for her.

3-My ring. I am SO mad at Zales. I will never buy another piece of jewelry there OR recommend it to anyone! It's a long story, but here is some of it: I've had my ring for three years and a small diamond on the channel ring has fallen out 6 times!! One of the times being today! I don't sleep with it, don't do hair with it, and don't drop it. They have built up the gold around it twice now. The funny thing is too, the diamonds that have fallen out have almost been different diamonds each time. AND- when kevin bought it, he told them he wanted a warranty on both (the solitaire and the wrap it goes in) so he bought one. Within that first year, some of the diamonds fell out, I had to get it re-dipped, re-sized.. blah blah, and they fixed it all for free. Well then the second year, they said the warranty only covered the solitaire and not the wrap. What the crap. So now they wont let us buy a warranty on the wrap (even though they said it was covered the first year) because it has to be bought at the time of purchase. I am so furious. They have been fixing the diamonds for free, but thats because its rediculous for them to fall out that many times! Especially after building up the gold around it TWO times! They said I could trade in my ring for another one (they dont make the same one anymore though) but we would have to trade it in for something that is double the price of what we bought ours for, and pay the difference. There is no way I am doing that. They owe us a freaking new ring that wont keep doing this. I am writing corporate. They said the manager that was over that store when we bought it did a bunch of shady things and so now that she is gone they have been cleaning up her messes.. so either that means they changed their rules now or the manager before made alot of mistakes and lied to us about having the warranty on both rings. Kevin paid $100 for the warranty and why would they fix the ring a bunch of times within the first year if it wasn't covered? I am just so confused about it all.

Anyway. Thats what is on my mind tonight. Just a little down. I need my hubby to come home and snuggle me and tell me everything is going to be ok. Because right now, I have no faith!

seriously stressed out momma right now.

Sunday, May 20, 2012

busy busy week!

this last week was CRAZY. It was the busiest week I have had since having Mia. I know you don't need a play by play, but incase you wanted to know every little thing we did..... :

Monday: I had a bridal shower to go to for my friend Ashley Dumas. I worked with her at the Salon. She is getting married June 1st. I am super excited for her! It was fun, but Mia had a rough day that day. She was feeling kinda sick, and was fussy. She wouldn't eat very good either.

Tuesday: I had Mary Kay. My mother in law babysat Mia while I went to my meeting from 6-9:45. Thanks Reva!

Wednesday: I had another Bridal Shower for my good friend Justina! She is marrying one of Kevin's best friends from highschool. (That is how I met her.) Her shower was sooo cute, I have to share pictures! The theme was vintage picnic, and all the food was sooo good. I loved the cookies you made Michelle! All the decor was done by Triana Ord, (the grooms sister) and she also took these pictures:

Justina holdin the baby :)

Thursday: I took Mia to the doctor. She still had her cold and was really struggling to eat. I felt like I needed to take her in. The doc said she just had a virus, and that she wasn't gaining quite enough weight. She had only gained about 1/2 of what she should have gained from her last appointment, but part of that is probably because she has had a stuffy nose and hasn't wanted to eat as much. She told me to do saline drops, and if Mia still acts hungry after I feed her, to give her an ounce or 2 of formula. Hopefully I can keep making lots of milk she she can just have that. She is doing lots better at eating now though. What a difference a few days can make! That night we went to say goodbye to our friend Alyssa. She went to DC for a dance internship. Good luck lyss, we will miss you!

Friday: went up to SLC to do my sister Chelsey's hair. I am so glad I am still doing hair here and there, I miss doing it every day but like being a stay at home mom better. :) I love being able to be creative though and make people look pretty! After I did her hair, we went to Carters because they were having a 70% off sale! I had to get some onsies and sleepers. They were too cheap to pass up... I think Mia has too many clothes. Just look at her closet, full of ONLY dresses and maybe like 3 sweaters...

Saturday: We totally slept in till 11. Mia woke up at 8:30 to eat but then went back to sleep till 11. YAY! It was awesome sleeping in. We then went to a Carnival for Kevins work (snow cones, churros, cotton candy, kettle corn, crawdads, hotdogs, hamburgers, face painting, pony rides..) That was lots of fun!! After that, we went to visit with Ally at her adorable new apartment in Spanish Fork. I seriously have cried like every day because she moved. I am so sad. She used to be like 2 blocks from me, and sometimes there would be like 3 times or even 4 times where we would hop back and forth to each others houses if we got bored or needed something. I will miss having her so close, but I am happy she is where she wants to be and is closer to family. We then had to go grocery shopping. That's always an adventure... I was glad to have kevin with me though. On our way home, we rented the vow from redbox. (to be honest, I didn't really like it). We went to bed around 11:00, and Mia was just so good all day, considering we were gone all day and she didn't get good naps. 

Sunday (today): We went to church, made bbq pulled pork in the crockpot,  took a nap, and made cookies. Mia had a blowout, (awesome...) but she was a really happy girl today. She is so animated and so alert and smiley. I LOVE it! She is my favorite girl. 

We had a great week, but hopefully this next week isn't as crazy.. 

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

feeling good about yourself

I just had a conversation with a friend on facebook via chat about life and looking at things positively. At the beginning of the night, I was feeling rather down on myself about my body image. By the time I got done talking to her, I didn't feel that way anymore. I feel important and beautiful and strong. 

She was telling me that sometimes you just have to tell yourself positive affirmations every day to make yourself start believing how great you really are. I believe in that! Regardless of how skinny or big you may be, you will always find a fault in your body if you LET yourself think negatively about it. 

And it doesn't even have to be about your body. You can tell yourself how you wish you were smarter, or had longer hair, or had a smaller nose, or how you don't like your wardrobe (all things I have told myself) but by doing so will only make you sad! Those things aren't even what's important in life! 

Although it's easier said than done, I need to start feeling better about myself. There is no one else like me. I am the only ME. In honor of the conversation I had tonight I am going to post some things I like about myself... (don't judge, this is helping me ok! haha)

-I am very forgiving
-I am creative
-I have a pretty good singing voice
-I am a good mom
-I can cook 
-I am a good wife and take good care of my hubby
-I am good at remembering to turn off the lights in the house (my dad would be proud about that one)
-I care about others
-I am outgoing
-I can make friends easily

Ok, I did it. Now I have to just say those things outloud every day this week to make myself BELIEVE those things are true.. 

I challenge all of you to write things you like about yourself on your blog, facebook, in your journal, or just say them outloud. I already feel better about myself. 

Thanks to my friend Lyss, for helping me feel better about myself tonight. You are great!

In closing, she said this at the end of the conversation:
Respect Yourself, or Nobody Else Will. 

amen! believe it sistas. 

Monday, May 14, 2012

mothers day

Yesterday was my first 'real' mothers day! I loved every minute of the day. I truly got spoiled.
photo taken by my mommy, christina clark

It started off with Mia sleepin in like a champ! We had put her to bed at 10:30 the night before, and she slept entirely through the night until 9:30 AM. Then, I fed her, and she fell back asleep until 11 AM! Wahoo!! Kevin made me breakfast in bed while I was still sleeping. He came in the room with cinnamon french toast with powdered sugar and HOMEMADE maple syrup (I know, awesome right) on top. He also brought me Apple juice. :)

I then got to open my present! I got a dozen roses (beautiful and smell so fresh) and a HUGE pack of gum from Sams club (if you know me, I love gum...... alot.) He also made two coupons and laminated them that said "good for one half personal day". So, I can have two half days with him and he wont have to go into work until 7pm, or I can have one full day where he doesn't have to go in. If you know Kevin, you know that he has never called in sick to work a day in his life, and hates to miss work. One, because the money is always needed, and two, because he is just a hard worker and wants to save those days for emergencies. He only gets 5 personal days a year, and then two paid vacation weeks. So I was really excited about that, and thought it was cute that he made the coupons on the computer and laminated them! I even got a long back massage with lotion- it was so needed!

I thought alot about being a mom yesterday. How lucky I am that I got blessed with our little miracle baby Mia. I am truly in love with the role of a mother. It's hard. It's rewarding. It's being tired. It's talking baby talk. It's sacrificing a shower for a day or two. It's being worried about your baby. It's clapping and rejoicing when the baby poops. (Mia has had pooping problems) It's singing primary songs. It's trying every possible thing to make the baby smile when shes sad. It's frustrating. It's being creative. It's amazing. It's fun. It's a calling from God. It's a divine calling! It's everything and a bag of chips! (haha..)

And I couldn't be happier about it. There are days where I feel like I don't know how to make Mia happy, or where I am not sure I can last the whole day.. or where I feel like I am failing. But at the end of the day, when I am giving Mia her bath and getting her ready for bed and rocking her, it's her smile that makes it worth it. It's her batting of her eyelashes that lets me know that she loves me. She appreciates me. And I will take every moment of that in because in 15 years she won't be so sure if she loves me anymore haha ;)

I know I was meant to be a mother, and in all honesty, it's been easier than I thought it would be. I have been blessed with patience so far and blessed with happy spirits and energy to take care of this baby girl. I am so grateful that Heavenly Father trusts me enough to take care of one of his princesses here on earth! She is truly so special! I love being her mommy, and can't wait to be a mom to more children some day. 

I cannot let the post go without talking about my sweet mommy. I love her so much. She is ALWAYS There for me. She is a woman of faith, charity, patience, hard work, and most of all, forgiveness! I did so many dumb things and said so many rude and dis-respectful things to my mom growing up but somehow she still loves me. She cleaned my house when I was sick during my pregnancy and kevin was working so much. She cooks me dinner. She rubs my back when it's sore. She listens to me cry when I tell her about someone who hurt my feelings. She calms me down when someone makes me mad. She teaches by the spirit. She puts her family first. ALWAYS. She trusts in the Lord. She believes in me. She is the greatest mommy! I could go on for days about all the things I love about my mom. But most of all I just want her to know that it means alot to me that she cares so much for me. She would give the shirt off her back if she had to. I know that without a doubt she will make it to the celestial kingdom and I hope I can be as great as her so I can be with her up there forever too :) I'm so glad she's my mom and has put up with me.

I just wanted to quickly say that even if you don't have kids, it's my belief that every woman is a mother in some way or another. We ALL care for and love and nurture someone in our life, and those are motherly qualities. I don't want those who cannot have kids or who have not yet married to think they are not mothers. You are ALL important to me and I have been cared for and nurtured by MANY that do not have children or are not married. So to women out there- Happy WOMEN'S day! I love you all.

Thank you Kevin for making the day so special, and telling me what a great mother you think I am. You are my world. I love you!

personality coming through- watch out! :)

Mia is so dang cute. I can't get enough of her. She has such a personality, and in the last couple of weeks we have really seen it show through! She has some silly faces she does, and she talks to us NON STOP! I love it!! 

She loves going on walks, although if the sun is in her face, she will squint her eyes and move her head back and forth till we get the sun out of her eyes. Haha. We have been taking tons of walks, we usually go on at least a mile walk a day. 

Here she is talkin to me. She likes this little toy mat.

She has started making this face in a few pictures. It's so funny! Kevin hates this sweater on her. He says it's a grandma sweater- but its the ONLY sweater she has and its 0-3 month but wayyyy too big. she needs some meat on her bones! 

face again. silly girl. We sit her in the bumbo once a day usually, she doesn't really like it yet though. 

face again. This was at church yesterday. :) 

Here she is smilin away at me. I just love her little self!

She will be 11 weeks old on Wednesday and I can't believe it! She is so much fun, and she gave me the best mothers day present ever, she slept for 11 straight hours that night!!! wahoo!! :)


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